to know and to understand thing..

Alhamdulillah, I've understood something again..

for every little things that happen to us..

for every what we need to do..

for every things that just happen to us..
the happy one,
the sad one..

for every decision that we need to make..
the smaller one,
the bigger one..

is always based on Allah..
hanyalah untuk mendapat keredaan Nya...

it looks simple isn't it?
maybe some of us had already learn this thing since small at school and by our parents...

like me...
the 'me' on my childhood is always a little girl with shyness..
with many thought that unexplainable...
every things happen surrounds me seems interesting and weird...
it just like I'm entering another world...

and the thing like 'what i need to do next' will never get crossed my mind...
because at that time I'm always have my mother around that can always answer most of my weird question...
all over and over again...
without bored she answered that thing...

and I realized when I'm still a child, things to be learn is always easily to understand...
it's just like a sponge that absorbs the water...
I bet most of us is the same like me at that time..

here,
the 'me' right now is kinda lost and always in confusing...
sometime the thing that I've already knew before can be something that I just understand and realize right now...

that's the differences..
to know and to understand..
it can't reach our heart..
with the thing that we know but we can't understand it...
because there will be an interruption of the information that we just get...

it just like a student that only memorize things inside the book right before the exam,
but when it comes to practical, none of the thing she read comes out to be present...

yes,I'm talking about myself...
things to change...
InsyaAllah...

with that,
I came to understand that when things come that makes me unsure and confused,
I need to refer back to Allah...
the One who creates me,
and the One that understand me the most...

kerana hanya Dia yang Maha Mengetahui atas setiap perkara yg berlaku...

p/s:
Alhamdulillah,result sem lepas sudah keluar..
hanya padaNya ku panjatkan kesyukuran..
sebab kalau nak diikutkan memang undefinable nak jawab exam yg lepas...
it's too unexpected question...
memang berserah sahaja...

Alhamdulillah, mungkin result ni juga sebagai ujian untuk menyedarkan bahawa saya bukan keseorangan dalam berusaha...
Allah sentiasa ada memberi petunjuk :)

here we go again

assalamualaikum...
long time I've left it without written here..

it's really a long time for everything to settle down..
I mean most everything...
the new sem..
and here it approach me closer..
the pre clinical exam
which make most of the student a bit trauma and got some acute myocardial ischaemia...

I'm not sure what to start..
but Alhamdulillah,things are getting better..
my emotion,my spirit..
it's kinda stable right now..
no more angina pectoris...

just for reminder..
for myself and others..

sometime kita rasa ada kekurangan dalam hati ni...
rasa lost..
hilang jap...
cuba review balik diri kita semula..
is there something got changed...
sometime kita tak perasan sesuatu tu berubah...
tengok2 memang hilang..
(bukan hide-and-seek tu ye...)
cubalah kita dekat kembali pada Allah...

kadang2 kita rasa kecewa..
bila kita rasa dah buat yg terbaik untuk sesuatu tapi tak dapat juga...
then,nak give up dah...
takpe,tu semua memang normal as human being...
tapi InsyaAllah ingat yg ni..

semoga sesuatu yang kita dah hilang atau kecewa itu,
Allah akan gantikan ia dengan sesuatu yang lebih baik...
InsyaAllah rasa tenang...

kita selalu dengar ayat ni kan..
(saya la yg selalu dengar tu)
tapi tak semua dakwah tu terkesan dalam hati...
lain orang,lain cara sentuhan hati pada Islam...

InsyaAllah,sebenarnya jalan pada Nya tu sentiasa ada,
cuma kita saja yg selalu menolak...

cuma saya rasa kalau bukan sekarang,
bila lagi saya nak berubah...

semoga kita semua tetap diteguhkan hati dan pegangan pada jalan yang diredai Allah...

i've got award from him :)

i got this..

award from Mr. Mamat 
to be his 100 follower..
thanx a lot...
:)
sorry for the late post...
i'm really appreciate it...
really thanx....

tak tau nak tulis ape lagi...
hope u always success in what u're doing..
and thanx for giving me this award..
it's an honor :)

hontonni arigatou gozaimasu

saya rasa terharu..

nasib baik tak menangis...

opps..

your life...try to figure it out..

things are not always gonna stay the same..
because the world is always spinning around..
and what we're doing right now can be a 360 degree change..
things on the upside can be turns down..
that's why we always need a preparation or a back up..

looking back right now..
how much do you prepare for your back up?
do you think you gonna always be on that comfort zone?
forever?

and when that day comes what do you think you gonna do?
trying to run and hide? maybe...
trying to blame others? maybe..
trying to be just like a robot?
a body without a soul..

always gonna talk about the past...

doing nothing

and just let things happen by it's own

without an effort 

but always hoping things are getting better..

life is not a fantasy my dear..

it's a reality...

and it's not forever...

cause it's just like a stopping center

with too many things looking sweet and beauty..

but it's not truly yours...

and if you smart enough..

you'll know when you're reaching your true destination,

there will be a truly things more beauty and more sweet,

than the one at the stopping center before..

then,you'll not forgot to reach your destination,

by getting tricky in that stopping center..

and being left out there,

before reaching where you should go actually..

so try to realize right now

try to clearly see right now
which one do you choose..
this temporary stopping center in this world
or the truly destination afterlife?

life can be tricky...
try to figure it out wisely...
then you'll see the truly...

p/s:
this is just me
trying to see what had she done
for her whole life
before she gonna reach that time
when nothing can be done..

accumulation of my cerebral cortex after the exam

o yeah...
selepas rasa ada increase intracranial pressure,
rupture of Circle of Willis,
unfunctioned Wernicke's area,
muscle crammed,
and needed all sort of antipsychotic drug
all the time during the exam's day,
now I felt much more calm and happy
though it still not as in euphoria state..
but it felt much more LEGA.....
after the exam...

yes,it's me...
student yang baru habis exam...
though everyone else had already enjoyed their holiday and getting into new sem..

result tu hanya boleh doa banyak banyak je....
InsyaAllah...
ujian tu sentiasa ada....
apa pun result tu,
I believe if I'm not getting it right now,
I'll get it somewhere else...
moga dimudahkan urusan dunia akhirat...
Amiinn....

right now rasa nak rest puas puas...
because after that things are getting harder...

the ending and the beginning

yoshi!!

tamatlah sudah saya study

untuk sem ni je tapi...

belum exam lagi...


macam pantun pulak...
okay,cut it out...

the main point is....
1. this blog dah bertukar kulit/skin/layout/what-so-ever-people-call-it

2.this sem sudah pun melabuhkan tirainya....
rasa sekejap sangat....and at the same time banyak unexpected things happen....
things dah study banyak..tapi information yang betul betul glued on my brain ni macam sikit je...(adoyai)

3.this december pun dah nak berakhir...semakin tua lah saya....
walaupun nak diikutkan muda lagi...ecece.....

4.exam will be start in another 2 weeks...
rasa macam tak cukup je nak revise semua...tapi still lagi leisure golek golek atas katil,haissh...problemo betul..


rasa betul betul kena berubah ke arah lebih baik...
change for good,
it worth,right..

and yes,
for that thing to accomplish,
it really need quite a good effort,sweat,sweet, and spirit..


p/s:
i do also hopes that i can totally switch off the dark and turn on th light...
em,macam pelik je ayat ni...
okay abaikan...








exam's study week mode:
turn it ON.....

                                             maybe i'll really change like this in this study week's mode
                                                                           (wish me not)

off

it come
on and off
if i can chose to switch it
i chose to
switch it off
from the start
i knew you

so,no more rewind
on the past..

if i knew forgetting is harder

you right there
there which was so far away from here

i'm gonna make it

i'm gonna make it
i'm gonna be strong
to reach it
the aim that is waiting for me to give it a strike...

no turning back
to the past
that already left
though it is pain..

it will all be worth
with what had happen

if i can make it
right now
which will lead me
on the future..

as long as tomorrow is still there
for me
to still have the hope

i'm gonna make it
to be more stonger than before

i wanna keep the tears
not to flow right now
but until the goal is reach
then i will allow it

to keep the pace constantly
till the end of the race

i'm gonna fight
in this battle

not just waiting for the goal to come
but to run to it

i'm gonna make it
InsyaAllah...

a reflection...

saya memang bukan seorang yang kuat...
saya akui saya lemah...
selau terjatuh.....
selalu cuai....

saya akui saya bukan bijak....
memang sejak kecil lagi saya selalu blur...
selalu tak paham....
selalu malas nak pahamkan....

tapi saya ada suatu kekuatan....
yang saya baru sedar sekarang....
which is.....
saya tak kan cepat mengalah...

saya tau setiap usaha akan ada hasilnya...
walaupun lambat sedikit untuk dapat hasilnya...
saya akan cuba sesuaikan diri dengan surrounding
walaupun susah....
tapi saya tak kan give up.....

saya sedar semua ini Allah beri pada saya....
daripada seorang yang tiada ilmu,Allah beri saya ilmu...
daripada seorang yang tiada arah tuju,Allah beri saya tujuan hidup ini....
hanya untuk mendapat keredaanNya...
saya memang tidak mempunyai apa apa tanpa pertolongan Allah....
tiada apa apa...

daripada seorang yang lemah,Allah beri saya kekuatan...
dengan ujianNya...
walaupun lambat untuk saya faham Hikmah di sebalik ujian tersebut....
ada kekuatan yang saya dapat dengan ujianNya...
dan saya rasa beruntung kerana bukan semua orang dipilh untuk menerima ujianNya...


"Allah tidak membebani seseorang melainkan dengan kesanggupannya"

InsyaAllah,
saya cuba buat yang terbaik dalam hidup ini dengan apa yang saya ada sekarang..

shock (with a very long explaination) =.="

"a picture can describe thousand of words"

some thing can happen unexpectedly...
and when that time occur,
normally our brain can't form a response to that stimulus at that time (unless you have a very good connection between the neuron and can speed up the response with the stimulus simultaneously)
but a reflex may be occur.....
a situation like the above picture....

or in a simplest word from a very long explaination...
it is a SHOCK...

actually what i wanna say today is some thing that happen to me unexpectedly just now....
and I'm consider myself still in a shock situation.... =.="

oh,no worry....
this shock is just a simple shock....
and I think it may be resolve after I take a nap and eat a bunch of food....
and after saya pengsan dengan sengaja.....

apa berlaku ada HikmahNya....


p/s:
this shock is different from
haemorrhagic shock,
hypovolaemic shock,
anaphylactic shock,
and toxic shock..
(which all of them is a medical jargon for shock)





okay nak sambung pengsan balik....